why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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