I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
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