Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
