my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
