did you get engaged???
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I supernannyed him into submission
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Randomize
