either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize