Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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