YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
