I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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