He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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