Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
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