Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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