so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
