he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
