The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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