I'm gonna have a badass scar
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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