Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
