how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Randomize
