Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Randomize
