singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
