she looked like the before picture.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
