piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Randomize
