I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
We are two peas in an std pod
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
