hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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