i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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