why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize