I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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