honey bunches of taint.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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