Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
