Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
