yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
