what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
