What did we do last night that was yellow?
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
