STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
