Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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