What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
