OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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