Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Little spoons don't ask big questions
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Randomize
