do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Randomize
