On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
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