i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
