better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
