I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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