Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I AM VODKA MAN
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
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