fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
