he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Randomize
