we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I can't put those talents on a resume
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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