I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
