Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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