I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Randomize
